my first experience with porn was when i was in the seventh grade and discovered fanfiction.net and after several months of innocent use writing g-rated a series of unfortunate events and sisterhood of the traveling pants fanfiction i got curious and went to the m-rated sisterhood of the traveling pants stories and from there on it was a downward spiral into constantly shame-reading sisterhood of the traveling pants porn, but there honestly wasn’t a huge sisterhood of the traveling pants archive so i eventually switched to reading high school musical porn and this continued for a while until one night i was reading my Teen Girls’ Bible which had all kind of helpful additional features for Teen Girls like a pretend advice column and one of the pretend advice column questions was like, “i’ve been looking at internet pornography and i feel very guilty about it, what should i do?” and the answer was “pray to god for forgiveness and then tell your parents so they can monitor your internet usage” and i immediately burst into tears and ran into my parents’ room at like 10 PM to tell them i’d been reading erotic fanfiction about troy and gabriella doing it backstage during the high school musical and we all got down on our knees and held hands and prayed to god for forgiveness and the next day my mom installed software that blocked fanfiction.net on every computer in the house
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Track: ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ
mew2:
ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ
THIS IS RHE FUNNIEST SOUND THING IVE EVER HEARD ON THIS SITE IT MAJES ME LAUGH SO MUCH I LOVE IT IM SO JAPPY
“Eehh..”
6 years ago
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what she says: I'm fine
what she means: I'm so glad that our lemon tree finally grew and sprouted fruitful lemony lemons. I mean, imagine, we can make lemonade, key lemon pie, lemon merengue pie. I think it's the most valuable of property that we have. I think we should go to the bank and get a loan, actually I think we should just get lemon tree insurance and then get a loan and use the lemon tree as collateral because it is now insured. I truly do love our lemon tree. Just imagine a life full of lemon trees, and all our beautiful lemons, endless possibilities. They're so beautiful, I wish I was a lemon. You wish you were a lemon? If you were a lemon I would put you on my shelf and cherish you like I cherish all our lemons. That's so beautiful, like I only hope that the whores aren't stealing our lemons you know those naughty whores always steal lemons and we do have a couple lemon whores in this community, those damn lemon-stealing whores I hate them because no one will take our prized lemons from us. Hey, has it been about 10 seconds since we looked at our lemon tree? It has been about 10 seconds till we looked at our lemon tree. Hey what the fuck
what she means: I'm so glad that our lemon tree finally grew and sprouted fruitful lemony lemons. I mean, imagine, we can make lemonade, key lemon pie, lemon merengue pie. I think it's the most valuable of property that we have. I think we should go to the bank and get a loan, actually I think we should just get lemon tree insurance and then get a loan and use the lemon tree as collateral because it is now insured. I truly do love our lemon tree. Just imagine a life full of lemon trees, and all our beautiful lemons, endless possibilities. They're so beautiful, I wish I was a lemon. You wish you were a lemon? If you were a lemon I would put you on my shelf and cherish you like I cherish all our lemons. That's so beautiful, like I only hope that the whores aren't stealing our lemons you know those naughty whores always steal lemons and we do have a couple lemon whores in this community, those damn lemon-stealing whores I hate them because no one will take our prized lemons from us. Hey, has it been about 10 seconds since we looked at our lemon tree? It has been about 10 seconds till we looked at our lemon tree. Hey what the fuck
6 years ago
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I don’t know if you know this but here’s a live feed of porn searches being made right now.
6 years ago
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sex is a lot like the uma thurman video. you’re covered in small animals. your hand falls off. brendon urie is there.
cute gender neutral things to call ur partner
- the big bean
- industrial sized jar of peanut butter
- left boob
- a literal bee
- paper towel
i need feminism because when jesus does a magic trick it’s a goddamn miracle but when a woman does a magic trick she gets burned at the stake
fabulous
i mean they did also kill jesus. that was a pretty significant thing that happened. like i understand where you’re coming from here but they very much did kill jesus.